Let’s Talk About Breast Cancer
For Breast Cancer Now’s “Left Unsaid” campaign, Sharon Morrison talks to Janey Swanson about the impact of living with breast cancer.
A breast cancer diagnosis can feel like the end of the world.
When I was diagnosed with breast cancer the first time in 2004, I thought I was going to die. I was devastated.
I found myself imagining the farewell letters I’d write to my three young children, and that’s normal.
I don’t know anyone who’s been diagnosed with breast cancer who hasn’t felt this way.
The second time, I felt exactly the same when I was given my diagnosis. Thankfully, almost 15 years later, I’m still here – and I’m fit and healthy.
Don’t go it alone
As a working single mum, when I was sent for investigations after finding a lump in my breast, I was determined there was nothing wrong with me and went on my own. My theory was that as long as I didn’t discuss the possibility of breast cancer with anyone, it wouldn’t come true.
And then it came true. My brain shut down when the consultant told me I had breast cancer. In fact, it was only when she started talking about surgery that it began to dawn on me and I burst into tears.
I wish I’d had someone with me. The second time, my sister was with me, which really helped.
There’s no “right” way to act
When I first had breast cancer, I had eight months of chemotherapy but only took a day-and-a-half off work for each chemo session. I found that keeping life as close to normal as possible meant I coped well with the treatment and could carry on working.
In 2009, I was diagnosed with breast cancer again. By then, I had my own business so decided to be kinder to myself and take more time off.
With hindsight, that just gave me more time to think, and whenever someone asked how I was feeling, I’d start crying. But everyone copes differently – and everyone’s situation is different.
Sharing a cancer diagnosis with family
If you have kids, there may be times when things are best left unsaid. My kids were eight, 10 and 14 when I was first diagnosed, and I felt I had to protect them from the severity of my diagnosis.
For me, it was very important that they thought everything was going to be OK and that I only had, as I always insisted, “a little bit of cancer”.
Learn more and take action
The second time I was diagnosed, my surgeon and oncologist assured me I’d simply been “unlucky” as there was no history of breast cancer in my family, but I couldn’t shake the feeling something was wrong.
I joined a trial researching genetic links in breast cancer and discovered I had the BRCA 1 gene alteration, which increases the breast and ovarian cancer risk in women, and breast and prostate cancer risk in men. As a result, I’ve had my ovaries removed and a double mastectomy. My relatives have also undergone testing and four have tested positive, three have had mastectomies and their ovaries removed and one of my daughters, who’s only 30, is about to undergo risk-reducing surgery.
We’ve been able to take action to keep safe because we had the knowledge.
Chemotherapy’s hard
In my two bouts of cancer treatment, I’ve had nearly every side effect going.
One of the worst was the effect it had on my tastebuds. Most things tasted metallic, especially tea, which I love.
Yet no matter how awful everything tasted, I put on weight, which was really unfair as I was eating hardly anything.
Side effects
On both occasions, I lost all my hair including my eyebrows, eyelashes and even the tiny hairs in my nostrils, which meant my nose was permanently running. I also lost my fingernails and my toenails, and had ulcers in my mouth and my throat.
But it was all worth it as chemo, along with radiotherapy and surgery, stopped the cancer in its tracks – twice.
Some side effects remain
My hair grew back on both occasions but my eyebrows have never reappeared. My other lasting reminder of chemotherapy is a terrible gut. I had very little control of my bowels and never felt safe when out.
I was told I might have IBS but no one really knew. About 10 years later, a locum GP suggested I try codeine, which has really helped me (please check with your doctor first). That, and tweaking my already healthy diet, helped me.
Looking good can make a big difference
Bald, overweight and with terrible dark shadows under my eyes as I was hardly getting any sleep at night, I looked like Uncle Fester from The Addams Family.
But putting on make-up, getting all dressed up to go to work and finding a fabulous wig helped me feel like – and look like – me again. As an added bonus, thanks to my wig, I never had a bad hair day!
Looking forward positively
Thanks to research such as that funded by Breast Cancer Now, more of us are surviving breast cancer.
In fact, Breast Cancer Now is on target to achieve its goal that, by 2050, everyone diagnosed with breast cancer will live – and live well. And if you can get through breast cancer, you can get through anything.
For more information visit breastcancernow.org to read more from the “Left Unsaid” campaign.
Read more from Breast Cancer Now.
