Diary Of A Modern Gran: Behind The Scenes
Once a week, I collect my grandchildren from school and take them back to our place for a quick snack. Then I get them to change into their dance and gymnastic gear (a process which is much more complicated than it sounds because they are running round the house by now, playing hide and seek) and then drive them to the local leisure centre.
After I drop off Rose, I watch George kick a football around in a field at the back along with some other lads plus their dads pretending to be David Beckham (they’re very good!). Then we go back to collect Rose from dance and I do a childcare swap with my son-in-law.
But I’ve often wondered what goes on in the dance class partly because I’d always yearned to do one myself as a child and never had the opportunity.
But this week – hurrah! – I’m being allowed behind the scenes because it’s the end of term “dance presentation”. Mind you, I have to behave myself. “You can’t take videos or pictures unless it’s just of Rose,” my daughter reminds me. (She and her husband have come too along with several other parents and at least three grans whom I know from around town.)
Rules are quite rightly much stricter nowadays.
We can’t cheer either although I feel like it as Rose performs her lyrical dance along with her friends. She looks much more graceful and well-behaved than she did an hour ago in our house!
Whoops! We’ve got an intruder. A tiny tot manages to prise herself from her mother’s arms. She’s heading for the dance floor and trying to copy the older ones. The dance teacher gently escorts her back. It reminds me of the time when my youngest son (now a music journalist) did exactly the same when his older brother and sister were doing something at school that he wasn’t part of.
Meanwhile, George is having a whale of a time in the back row of the auditorium along with his mates from school.
The presentation lasts nearly an hour but the time seems to flash by. It’s so lovely to see the poise and self-confidence as well as an “Am I doing all right?” look on my granddaughter’s face.
“Well done,” I say, as they finish and she runs up the stairs to give us all a cuddle in turn. There’s something about her little face that reminds me of a photograph in a family album from about 60 years ago.
“Do you think she looks like me?” I ask my daughter.
“No,” she says.
I can’t help feeling a flash of disappointment.
Oh well. At least Rose is having the dancing lessons I never got. It’s some compensation.
Talking of end of term, we’ve just had Rose and George’s end of term reports. I say “we” because my daughter kindly shared them on the family WhatsApp group.
I’ve always felt sorry for teachers at this time of the year. It must be very difficult to come up with different things to write for 30 odd pupils in the class.
My grandchildren’s teachers have clearly spent a lot of time to “focus on the individuals” as the expression goes.
George can apparently “apply his phonic knowledge independently to create sentences” which is more than I can do. Phonics are beyond me! I learned to read by reading several books without fully understanding what each word meant. But somehow I must have absorbed their meaning because I was an avid reader from a young age.
“You must look at the last line of Rose’s report, Mum,” says my daughter.
Oh my goodness! The teacher writes that she hopes she will “continue to develop your writing skill as you transition to key stage two and flourish into a fabulous author and illustrator.”
I’ve always known Rose was a born writer from the stories she writes down at night in her various little notebooks.
And I love to think that she’s following the family tradition.
On the other hand, we never know what our children are going to be when the time comes, do we? As a wise great granny friend says, all that really matters is that they are happy and healthy. Very true.
Do you have any stories about school reports? Do email them to us at moderngran@dcthomson.co.uk.
Ask Agony Gran
“My daughter and son-in-law have lived about twenty minutes from me since their children were born ten years ago. But now they are moving a good three hours away because of work. They have suggested that I sell my home and move near them so we can still be near each other. I also help out with school runs and holiday care. Part of me feels this might be an adventure. I also want to continue seeing my grandchildren every day. I’d be lonely without them. But I’m also worried that it will be hard for me to find new friends.’ Anonymous
Jane says:
I can see your predicament. It’s flattering that they want you to come too (even though your childcare services probably come in very handy!). And I can totally understand that you’d miss them dreadfully if they weren’t round the corner any more. But you might well find it hard at first to settle somewhere new.
On the other hand, you’ve also put your finger on something else. It could be a great adventure! One option might be to rent out your home and then rent a place near your family when they move, to test the water. If it was me, I’d give it at least six months, if not a year before making up my mind.
There’s one other thing you might consider. What if your daughter and son-in-law move again for work? That might mean another upheaval for you unless you go with them. It’s obviously important to talk through all these angles as a family. Good luck.
Family News
TikTok is apparently the most popular news source for 12-15 years olds according to a new survey. If you don’t know what that is, ask one of the children in your family!
The Funny Things They Say
Thanks to Judith for sending this in!
“When my grandsons were about six years old – they’re cousins – one of them asked me, ‘Grandma, how is it that my Daddy has got grey hair, and yours is still brown? Is it magic?'”
“No, it isn’t,” said Will, “She dyes it!”
“Well, this saved me having to explain it, I guess!”
Please send us your funnies by emailing moderngran@dcthomson.co.uk.
Grandparent Tip
“My grandchildren live in Australia. Every week, I send a video through WhatsApp talking about what I’ve been doing during the week. Then they send me one back. It’s a great way of keeping in touch. I find it easier than scheduling a mutually-convenient time for us all to talk.” Shirley
Do you have any tips? Do send them to us at moderngran@dcthomson.co.uk.
Your Feedback
“I was interested in your column last week about fitting in your own work with looking after grandchildren. I work part-time outside the home but I also look after my two grandchildren (aged 12 and 10) after school and in the holidays. When we started this arrangement, I insisted that my son found a ‘back up’ in case either he or I couldn’t do our days. He found a local child carer who is happy to step in for emergencies. It works really well.” Angela, Basildon
Where To Take The Grandchildren
Going to London with the grandchildren? You can save money by visiting free attractions such as the Changing of the Guard. There’s also free entry to the Natural History Museum and the British Museum.
Children’s Book Of The Week
Need some inspiration for books for your grandchildren? I bring you my top pick every week.
My young readers loved A Boy, His Dog and The Sea by Anthony Browne (Walker Books. £12.99). This story is about Danny who takes his dog for a walk along the beach. Danny really wants to play with his big brother Mick. However, Scruff shows him how exciting the beach really is. They also save the day. (I won’t tell you how in case it spoils the plot!)
Hope you don’t mind me sharing some exciting news with you! My new novel COMING TO FIND YOU is high in the Sunday Times paperback chart. My novel is about two women who live in the same seaside house at different times. Elizabeth is a mother during the Second World War and will do anything to protect her son. Nancy is my present-day heroine. Both are under threat. Both are strong women. Both are determined to survive.
You can find my novel in bookshops, supermarkets (including Tesco, Sainsburys and Asda) and also online. If you’re a Kindle reader, it’s on special offer for 99p (limited time only). Here’s the link just in case you fancy reading it! https://amzn.to/3NRv8kB.
Also available in audio.
