What To Do When You’re Feeling Fearful
By Camilla Sacre-Dallerup
Try these powerful tools to regain a sense of calm, says life coach and hypnotherapist Camilla Sacre-Dallerup
With lockdown continuing, it’s no surprise that many of us are feeling worried, uncertain and probably a little scared at the moment. When will I get to see my family and friends again? Will I be able to cope financially? Is my job or business safe?
Whenever I feel fearful, I lean on all the mind tools I have learnt over the years to help me switch from a “doom and gloom” mindset to “believe and trust” one. I know that a change of thinking can have a hugely positive effect on difficult situations and I’ve learnt this from not only running my own business for almost 20 years but the proof lies in my clients’ own experiences, too. When you consider that 85% of the things we worry about never actually happen, you have to wonder if there’s any point in worrying so much – or at all.
Try these ways to bring some balance back into your life…
Stay in the moment
Practising mindfulness is really useful here as it helps us learn to consider our thoughts. It reminds us that we can observe our thoughts without needing to be our thoughts. Give it a go the next time you start to feel the fear creeping up.
Firstly notice that you are feeling fearful but rather than let it engulf you, choose instead to simply acknowledge it without attaching yourself to it. Let it sit there and be what it is – a thought. By being more present in the moment you can gain clarity as the thought passes.
Meditating can really help to overcome these feelings of fear too, and you can find a wonderful meditation to support situations just like the ones we are all experiencing right now called Vedana in my book It’s Not You, It’s Me.
Remember, you’re in control
Whenever I find myself in a challenging situation, I remind myself that although what is happening might make me feel out of control, I do have control over how I choose to respond to it. I have the power to choose the thoughts that are going to support me the most.
Let’s say someone was worrying about not making enough money to pay their rent or mortgage. They could either choose to focus on not making that money and how awful that would be, or they could choose to believe that of course they will find a way. Have they spoken to their landlord or mortgage provider for advice? Do they qualify for government support? If they run a business, could it be adapted? Could family or friends help? You may be familiar with the law of attraction and I am a firm believer in what you focus on is what you attract, so harnessing its principles could help you stay in control of those fearful thoughts and channel your focus positively, too.
Retrain your brain
It helps to be creative when you’re thinking about a tough situation. Sometimes we can get so fixated on an answer arriving from a specific source but once we let go of that limited belief and start considering that maybe it will arrive from somewhere else, that’s when opportunities arrive.
The power in having a positive mindset alone is incredible but believe me, this takes some practice! As we have a negative bias in the brain, which wants to lead us away from the positive, we can get stuck in what is known as “a lack mentally”. When you set your internal compass to abundance and start thinking, “Of course I can do this”, you set yourself up as a magnet to new opportunities and situations.
Training our minds through affirmations, meditation and reframing all help strengthen a positive mindset and you can learn more about the power of reframing in my second book, Reinvent ME.
Inhale, exhale
Doing a few minutes of breath exercises can really help you calm and settle your nervous system, if you are feeling anxious. Diaphragmatic breath – also known as the belly breath – is particularly good for lowering anxiety levels and you can try it for yourself. Want to give group meditation a try? If you’d like to join me at one of my meditation classes, sign up at Unplug Meditation and you can take part wherever you are in the world via the Zoom app in the comfort of your own home. I look forward to seeing you!
Camilla Sacre-Dallerup is the best-selling international author of It’s Not You, It’s Me (£9.99, Watkins Publishing). For more information about Camilla, visit www.zenme.tv.
Allison Hay
I joined the "My Weekly" team thirteen years ago and, more recently, "The People's Friend". I love the variety of topics we cover both online and in the magazines. I manage the digital content for the brands, sharing features and information on the website, social media and in our digital newsletters.
